Zombie in your home: A choose-your-own horror

Duncan P. Pacey

Argh alihgoaihwfalwf.
That time already?
It's morning - 6:00 a.m., as the wailing of your alarm clock so helpfully explains - and the air in your bedroom is like a bloody ice box. It's a Monday, and normally you'd be thinking of going to work today, but you're not really sure if that's an option.
Not since the zombies started popping up, anyway...
You've been watching it on the news almost religiously for the past four weeks. First it began overseas, but within the past few days there have been cases appearing at home, too. Some kind of infection is getting into people's bloodstreams and turning their brain into this, this awful, angry mush. It's like watching a horror movie, except in real life.
You swing your tired legs out of bed and into your favourite pair of slippers, feeling the soft cottony goodness envelope your cold tootsies. Damn, this would be so much easier if the temperature was higher. But there we go, ain't that just the way. Zombies couldn't have just waited till summer, huh? Had to go and attack in the middle of god-damn winter.
Anyway, you stand up to stretch out your groggy muscles when you hear a smash downstairs. It sounded like glass breaking...
I proceed downstairs to investigate
Eh, it was probably nothing.