Any which way but dead!

S M White

Your alarm clock wakes you up early on a Saturday morning, and even though you’d like nothing more than to hit the cancel button as you're still pretty drunk from the night before, you’re determined to make full use of the day.
You pull the duvet off you and realise you're still fully clothed, so you guess it must have been a good night if you didn't even have the chance to undress before passing out. After the usual rubbing of the eyes, you stretch your arms and with a wide yawn, get out of bed and head over to the window.
Opening the curtains, the sun temporarily blinds you for a second and as you avert your eyes away from the glare, you see that it’s a clear blue sky outside and you smile widely knowing that you’ve made the right choice in getting up.
“<I>Sun is shining in the sky, there ain’t a cloud in sight….”</I> you start singing ELO’s classic song as you turn, cross the room and open the bedroom door.
As you look across to the bathroom, you contemplate brushing your teeth and having a shower but you come to the conclusion that breakfast is more important and they can both wait til after.
“<i>It’s stopped raining, everybody’s in a play and don’t you know…”</i> You continue as you descend down the stairs and into the living room where you stop and notice that the TV isn’t switched on, which was strange as normally your mum and dad are up and dressed every Saturday, watching the morning news and enjoying a cup of tea. You shrug and decide they must have gone to the shop or something, and carry on through into the kitchen.
You cross the kitchen floor tiles towards the breakfast cupboard and you see that your mum has the fridge open looking inside.
<i>“Mum, can you grab me the milk”</i> you ask as you reach up, open the cupboard and bring down a box of Special K. Looking over your shoulder, you see that your mum still hasn’t moved, so you put down the box and repeat
<i>“Mum, can I have some milk PLEEEASE?”</i> emphasising on the politeness which she so often scolds you about, but still no response. You cross the floor again and you put your hand on your mums shoulder whilst singing the last line in the verse <i>“it’s a beautiful new day, hay ay…..”</i>
Out of nowhere your mother turns around snarling, her face white and her eyes completely bloodshot. Completely surprised, you take a step back<i> </i>
<i>“Mum, are you ok?”</i> you ask nervously.
Blood trickles down your mum’s gritted black teeth and you’re pretty sure she’s bitten her tongue off as she open’s her mouth, screams and lunges at you. You both hit the sink as you’re pushed back by her attack and you struggle to hold your mum’s head back, as she starts insanely biting closer and closer.
Even though you’ve no idea what’s happened, you somehow know if she sinks her teeth in, you’re done for. You look around for something, anything, to keep your mum from tearing your throat out. To the left of you, upon the draining board, you see a frying pan and a steak knife obviously cleaned up from last nights supper.
Not having much time, you decide to go for....
.....the knife
.....the frying pan