This One Elf Guy Goes on a Quest or Something

Casey Maxwell

<b>You're an elf guy ...</b>
... but not like the Santa kind of elf or the cookie-making kind.  You're more like the full-sized Lord of the Rings kind of elf only you speak regular English and you're like 40% less douchey.
You live in fantasy times.  You know what I mean, like with castles and dragons and goblins and shit like that.  Only there are also normal things like frozen yogurt shops and skateboards and stuff.
Anyway you just got yourself a quesadilla to go from the local elf Mexican food restaurant and you're on your way back to your elf house to watch a little elf TV.  Suddenly this dwarf guy you've never seen before comes running up to you.  He's wearing a tiny dwarf-sized trench coat and carrying this old-looking scroll-type deal.  He seems genuinely excited and asks if you'd like to go on an adventure with him.  What do you say?
"Sure, why not? I don't really have anything better to do. And I mean, this is fantasy times after all. Isn't going on adventures what fantasy times are all about?"
"Nah, I'm gonna go eat this quesadilla and watch some TV. Thanks anyway, though."